“My self confidence comes from the fact that I have discovered my dimensions. It does not befit me to make myself smaller than I am.” ~ Edit Södergran
There is a potential you. A you that is greater than you are at the present point in time. And that potential you is also a more authentic you. Your real you. However, oftentimes we are not fully open to that potential self.
At a recent workshop we delivered, there was, as always a mixed group of people – NLP trainers, coaches, psychotherapists, psychologists, business owners, engineers, students… A very diverse and a very interesting group. Albeit diverse, they had one thing in common – a passion to take their lives to a higher level, to dig deep and uncover what is the difference that makes the difference.
What happened with the zest?
What happens when you are open to new learnings, discoveries, insights, and how come that zest doesn’t last… It comes in waves, and it goes away, and in between some people close themselves, shut themselves from the world if you like, and go back to the old established well known and familiar patterns…
This was the most pressing question, and the one that no matter where we work and who we work with, this kind of question or a variation of it, pretty much always comes up! In other words, what is it that we do, on our road to self-development and self-discovery that contributes to us shutting ourselves off, close ourselves from ourselves?! And when we do close ourselves from ourselves, who and what do we open ourselves to?
Getting the answer is not enough
This ain’t an easy one to answer, however it is not the answers we are looking for, it is the action that we are interested inJ! Answers sometimes serve the purpose of sidetracking us, lulling us into believing that ‘now we have the answer we are half way there’ kind of thing. Having an answer works for some things, yet when it comes to personal growth, we wind that answers play a very little role, as most people like to cling onto them, without really taking any action. Answers are a sure road to taking us to the world of words and rationalizations.
So why do we stop in our tracks and why do we close ourselves to ourselves when the shadow of a breakthrough appears?! A fear of the unknown?! A fear of not being prepared for that, which awaits us on the other side?! A fear of responsibility?!
A shadow of a breakthrough is not a breakthrough
Remember that a shadow of a breakthrough is not a breakthrough. Just like the map is not the territory. We all talk about great breakthroughs and wanting them. But do we really want them? Let’s face it, very few of us, are prepared to face them, and use the momentum that they bring.
Very often this has to do with self-sabotage, which is unconsciously nurtured, by many. And fed daily! And when you do this, you will inevitably be nurturing and feeding the nagging inner voice. The voice of: today is not the right day, wait until tomorrow. And then you will find it that the voice of self -sabotage needs company, and that’s where the guilt kicks in, and suddenly the veil of illusion slides down and you realize that time is of the essence and that if you continue with the same old shutting yourself from yourself, leaving the party just when it starts to get interesting and fun, you will find yourself with a handful of excuses and a myriad of “I could have …” “I should have …” sentences.
Making a decision will help
So instead of running away from the shadow of a breakthrough, make a decision to stick to your guns no matter what. Work with that breakthrough, welcome it! As shutting yourself from yourself is not befitting of you. You are bigger than that. Find that greatness that you have, and start operating from it more and more.
Because you cannot postpone starting to live your real life. Or actually the truth is worse. You can postpone your real life. Forever. And then the life you live will become your real life. So, if not now, then when?
With this in mind may we invite you to consider all the breakthroughs that could have happened in your life had you just had the guts to let go of the familiar old patterns, and see how you could learn from these insights, so next time you are on the verge of a breakthrough you open your arms and welcome it, rather than running away from it.
Wishing you a wonderful week and sending you oceans of love,
Your real life trainers,
Lidija & Thomas
© Momentum Strategies 2013